BDSM and sex positivity

By: Zoe Kolker, Columnist

Over the past few semesters the Sexual Assault Peer Educators (SAPEs) have focused on creating events and tabling that concentrate primarily on sex positivity. Which, in case you’re not familiar with the term, is the idea that sex, as long it is mutually consensual, is a positive and normal practice that should be celebrated instead of viewed as a taboo. It’s important to spread this message because being open to talking about sex can help build more consensual and mutually pleasurable sexual interactions.

BDSM is a great topic to cover when discussing sex positivity. BDSM refers to erotic/sexual practices such as role playing, bondage, domination and submission, masochism, etc. The BDSM community is made up of a diverse group of people who participate in a range of these activities, while emphasizing that the nature of these acts should be safe, sane, and consensual. Within the community, there’s also an emphasis on negotiation. This requires open discussion on what each partner is interested in, what they want to try, and what they would not be open to doing. Many people were introduced to BDSM through the popularity of 50 Shades of Grey”and its upcoming sequel. I bring this up because it is important to note that this movie shows many signs of an unhealthy relationship and is not an accurate representation of the BDSM community. It is not an accurate depiction of sex positivity. It is critical to remember that both parties involved in any type of sexual activity should be experiencing something that is both pleasurable and safe. Even if you’re not a part of the BDSM community, you can still use negotiation and an open dialogue with your partner to help have more pleasurable sex. Try sitting down with your partner and discussing what interests you or what boundaries you want to set.

 

Join SAPE Feb. 23 at 6:00 p.m. for a Sex Positive Movie Night in West Village Commons Ballroom C, where we’ll be screening “Magic Mike XXL.”

 

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