A conversation on menstruation

By: Megan Graves, Columnist

I don’t know how you’re all feeling, but personally, I don’t think we’re talking about our periods as much as we should be. I mean, they’re kind of fascinating, right? Not to mention uncomfortable and brutal and reassuring and annoying. The only arguably “good” thing about menstruating is knowing that everything’s working the way it should be. So, in hopes of sparking some more period-talk, here are some fun facts about what half the population recognizes as the least-fun time of the month.

1) According to RandomHistory.com, the average biological female will spend approximately 3,500 days menstruating in their lifetime. That’s about nine years. Nine crampy, bloated, eating-Nutella-out-of-the-jar years. That’s one humorless uterus.

2) Surprisingly, most people only lose about 2-3 tablespoons to a half-cup of blood during each period. Apparently it doesn’t take much to make it seem like there’s been a Friday the 13th level massacre in your pants.

3) Dudes get periods, too! Well, sort of. Men have a monthly hormonal cycle in which they experience different moods and hormonal changes. The name for these man-struations? Irritable Male Syndrome. Turns out we all get the monthly grumpies.

4) Despite what the media may have led you to believe, periods do not consist of leaking blue Gatorade. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, check out any sanitary pad ad. They’ll prove its absorbency by pouring blue liquid on the pad they want you to buy. Apparently red dye would be too graphic, but realistic cartoon fungus toes used when selling anti-fungal creams and powders are just fine.

5) According to the Huffington Post, about 70 percent of women use tampons, and over the course of a lifetime tampon costs add up to about $1,500-$2,000. And that’s JUST tampons. Add in money spent on pads, Midol, new underwear and necessary comfort food (or wine), and your Aunt Flo turns out to be one costly lady.

I know periods suck. Trust me, I know. Between feeling like you got hit in the stomach with a wrecking ball to constantly worrying if you’re going to bleed through those super cute white pants you just bought, it’s a pretty rough time. But they’re also really cool. I mean, periods prove that you’re capable of growing life within your own body. They’re a monthly reminder that you’re healthy and strong. They’re synced with the moons and the tides, reminding us that we all have a little bit of mother nature storming inside of us. It just doesn’t get more empowering than that.

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